Why I Would be a Horrible Girlfriend to a Non-Surfer




So it's best if I preface this with some blunt honesty. I basically spend all of my free time surfing. The rest of my time is split between just a few things; sleeping, working, working out (when gyms are open), playing World of Warcraft, reading, catching up on shows, and eating.


Now if I had a boyfriend, they could reasonably eat with me, and I could dig into my reading time to have more time with them. I could also cut down on some WoW time, but not too much, I have like 10 quests I have to do at any given time.


I can't just not work, not sleep, and not workout. And I don't like working out with another person (very distracting). So all I have left is basically surfing. They have to surf. If they want any solid time with me, they have to surf.


Picture this: It's a Saturday Morning and I'm finishing my cup of coffee and they say, "Hey babe, so what do you want to do today?" My answer will literally always be surfing. Okay yes, I can take a few days off from the water, but if it's been a few days since I paddled out (usually because of work), of course I am going to want to surf over the weekend.


From the title of this post, I'm not saying "Non-Surfer" as just someone who has never surfed before, but I also mean someone who doesn't breathe the ocean. If I were a mythical anthropomorphic creature, I would be a Mermaid (or a Siren on a moody day). Some people are Wood Nymphs (hikers, rock climbers, campers, etc) and some are Dragons (flying, extreme sports, snow boarding). But me? Water is my home.


Water is where I have always gone to calm down, to relax, to be free. When I was younger, I lived 5 miles from the beach, and if I was having a bad day, you could bet money I would walk that five miles there and back just to listen to the waves and forget about how shitty being a human is sometimes. I spent a year living in the mountains in Thailand, nowhere near a beach for a year. After the first six months, I spent a day in Doha on a layover, and I could literally smell the ocean from the apartment I rented and I walked down to the shore before I did anything else.


When I used to run, know where I ran? The beach. I used to play volleyball too - beach volleyball. Favorite place to read? On a towel under the sun on the beach.


Dating someone who wasn't also an ocean creature just isn't in my cards. I'll never suggest rock climbing, camping, snow boarding, or hiking unless every beach is literally closed.



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